Not Just a Plus One

People choose their pastor and not their pastor’s wife.  Many times, a pastor’s wife may be left feeling like a tag.  You may feel like a mere “plus one” or just a bonus that came with the offer.  As a result, you find yourself constantly adapting to fit people’s expectations of what a pastor’s wife should be. 

One day you try to be a quiet, reserved person, and the next time you try to be outgoing and friendly. Next, you try to be creative and artistic, and at other times, you try to be structured and organized, all the while trying to figure out, “what do they want me to be like, and how will I get them to like me?” 

Have you bent so much that you are now bent out of shape?

Not Just a Plus One - You are not an afterthought

Well, I have news for you. You are not just a last-minute addition to the situation, nor are you an afterthought. You are not that awkward guest at the party who was not actually invited. You are an essential part of the equation. When God made mankind, He decided that the model was not good enough without you. Notice I used the word “mankind” and not just “man.”

That is because the first edition of man was man and woman together in one package. The Bible says in Genesis 1 that male and female he created them and yet, it was just Adam on the scene.

Not Just a Plus One - You were there from the beginning

That means the male and female existed in Adam. That was why God did not go back to the dust of the earth to make Eve, He brought her out of the man He had already made. Not just that, all that mankind would be, create, produce, invent and become, had existed as a seed in that man called Adam. God looked at this man (mankind) and said the man (kind) needed a helper. He said the man (kind) needed a being, an entity that would help him fulfill all that God had created him to be.

Help Is Not A Bad Word

You see, God created a helper not just to help a man in the context of marriage. He created a helper to help humanity, to help societies, to help organizations, to help the government, and to help church establishments. The helper is not the maid. The helper is an essential part of the equation. Help is not a dirty word. Think about it, the Holy Spirit was sent into our lives to be the Helper. Is He then our maid? Is He any less God because He was sent to help? How can you live a victorious Christian life without the help of the Holy Spirit?

You Bring Good to the Picture

God would not sign off on His own work until He had created the woman. That is how important you are! Until He created the woman, He couldn’t look at His work and determine that it was good.

A church is good because the pastor’s wife is there. Your husband’s life is good because you are there. Your children’s lives are good because you are there. The lives of women in that church are good because you are there. The lives of the men, the leaders, the ministers, the units, the small groups, the fellowships, and all the systems in that church are good because you are there.

So, hold your head up high. Do not let people redefine you when God has already defined you as the essence that makes everything else good.

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